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Monday, October 10, 2005

Speak of the Very Devil

Image hosted by Photobucket.comBeth: It comes down to Vinatieri again? Against a Vickless Atlanta team?


Ha ha I've never seen a team shoot themselves in the foot worse than the Ravens did today. Two guys ejected, and I don't even know how many yards on penalties. They played dirtier than the Raiders at their heyday.

Beth: Then you obviously weren't watching the Patriots. *glowers*

Kristen: My favorite thing about the Ravens/Lions game highlights was all the various Ravens players standing around and watching Kevin Jones run down the field. Whistle, wha?

Also, isn't Mer at this Philly/Dallas game? If so, I'd be on the lookout for mushroom clouds from Texas.

Beer, Mer. Lots and lots of beer.

Sam: Beth, I don't care what the Patriots did, it can't have been anything like tying for second place in the all-time NFL record for most yardson penalties in a game.

Beth: I was not aware there was a record, Sam, and of course I was being facetious anyway. But the Pats really did make what should've been a blowout all too interesting, and I'm frustrated with them.

*switches to FOX in anticipation of Yankees game*

Ooh, no wonder we haven't heard from Mer.

Mer: (speak of the very Devil) I have perhaps never had so little fun on a Sunday afternoon. The game was over by the time we finished fighting the atrocious Dallas traffic and made it to our tiny seats in the pit that is Texas Stadium.

Too many things to say, most of which I need to save for a blog entry. But I will say this: for as much shit as Cowboys fans like to talk about how "terrible" Eagles fans are, they really are no different. They cheer injuries to opposing players, they taunt fans, and they swear in front of children. Hypocricy is fun to witness. (Speaking of hypocricy, my favorite was when a bunch of fans left with 6 minutes left in the 4th quarter. All the Cowboys fans stood to jeer the Birds fans who were leaving. One minute later, most of those Cowboys fans who had just been talking smack got up and left too. That was my favorite part of the day, not including the Sheldon Brown fumble recovery returned for a TD.)

Also, a little boy of no more than 10 was sitting in front of me wearing a Cowboys jersey and Yankee hat. He is destined for a long life of douchbaginess. That kid is everything that is wrong with frontrunning sports fans.

I'd also like to point out that since 2001, the Birds are 1-4 in games played the week before their bye. Normally that might be a pointless stat, but given how good their record has been in those years, one has to think that there might be something to. Either way, I'm not pleased.

Beth: I heard that week before the bye stat. Do you know why that might be? Just a coincidence? How do other teams in the league stack up with that stat? Does anyone even care, though? Seems like the kind of thing sportscasters drag out of their butts in garbage time. You're right about their record being good anyway...but I'm sure even if they were in the toilet, you'd want to beat the Cowboys, and it still sucks.

Mer: The only reason that stat concerns me is because the the losses have all been the same type: the kind where the Eagles never really show up. It suggest a lack of mental perparation as the team looks ahead to the bye week. I know that this year is different - McNabb clearly looked uncomfortable and hurt out there. But still, something about this team's mental preparation worries me. Another example: Last week they were extremely timid in the first half, allowing KC to build a nice lead. By all accounts, the Eagles were confident during halftime that they would win the game...they say they didn't go over X's and O's but instead they just talked about how mentally they weren't in it and that in the second half, they would be. I knew immediately after last week's game that today's game was going to be a disaster. How many times can you only show up for half of a game and still win before it bites you in the ass?

Sam: Apropos of nothing, I've got to admit, Chad Johnson's touchdown anticsare growing on me. Today he gave the ball CPR in the endzone. It's funny if he's not doing it against your team, although I am also dead certain they're in direct violation of the league's "you're not supposed to think about it beforehand, celebrations are only OK if they're not planned" stance.

Kristen: This is a simple question that I missed sometime last week but what, exactly, was everyone's problem with Brady's interview following the San Diego game? I just watched it and I don't understand the issue.

Beth: I don't get it either. I've read it, I've listened to it, and I've watched the video, and I don't understand. I think they so badly WANT him to lose his cool at this point they're seizing on whatever they can get.

Meanwhile: This just in.

Kristen: Obviously, I don't wish the man health trouble, but I have to wonder, how the hell has he been coach of that team for so long?

It's been a long time since we rapped at ya

But we've had pressing baseball matters to attend to.

Suddenly SeymourSam: OK ladies: Cadillac. Is he for real? I mean, obviously he's for real, what with being the best rookie RB in, oh, the entire bloodyhistory of the game. But can he keep it up down the stretch? I tend to think 'no', but then again I tend to think like that for every rookie until he explicitly proves otherwise. Also, Michigan/Michigan State on Saturday. I cannot adequately explain how ill this will make me if we lose.

Beth: I don't really know how to judge Cadillac, although that's quite the nickname. Personally I think RB is the most brutal, horrible position in the game. Most of them don't last too long anyway.


A coworker of mine told me this story when we were driving back from New York. He used to have to go to Texas on business quite a bit, and also had some acquaintances in the area. Once, on a trip he was visiting one of their houses, and the acquaintance went to have a "conference" with his neighbor that lasted quite a while.

The town was in an uproar over the high school football coach. The coach's son was the starting and star quarterback. The parents of the backup cried nepotism, and made a stink about their son getting to play. Such a stink, in fact, that there were board of education meetings and town-wide debate sessions.

Eventually, the coach was ordered--twice--to play the backup. He refused. His son played. And then, when things became too much for him to bear, the coach quit.

At the time my coworker's acquaintance was discussing this with his neighbor, the townspeople were so angry with the coach they planned to go to the state board of education and get his teaching license revoked so he could never again work or teach in a school in the state of Texas.

They were unsuccessful, and the coach and his family moved to another town and started over. The son was quickly the star quarterback there, too.

What my coworker told me was that the son, the star quarterback, was Ty Detmer.

Let me also say I love Adam Vinatieri. Even when he's in ridiculously bad Papa Gino's commercials. I want to hug him for seven straight years. Then, sex.

Kristen: Seriously, that man is responsible for me buying an obscene amount of Papa Gino's.

Sam: Well Ty Detmer was great, GREAT in college. In the pros, he's bouncedaround, and he was one of the single worst backup QBs in Detroit Lions history which, considering the team, is really saying something.Man, I hate that the Sox are having a day game. There's only so muchintense rivalry I can take at one time, and flipping betweenYankees/Sox and Michigan/MSU is not going to be a good scene.Oh and by the way, ladies, Baby Vick is having a monster day forwhatever the hell Virginia school he plays at. He runs just as well as his big brother does.


Kristen: Richard Seymour?Wha?


I'm going to start weeping now, like, for real.

They killed my Patriot baby daddy!


I just...I just don't know anymore.

He went out with a knee injury and had a brace on it and I'm not sure if he played again. According to the idiot on the sideline, he's "okay" but who knows?

Football makes me want to cry this week. I'm going to weep real tears.

Sam: Kristen, don't even. You don't know what the Lions did today. Orwhat was done to the Lions today. As my brother (who wasn't watchingthe game but kept on checking the score) said:

"I saw that they were up 19-17 in the 4th. Then I saw that they wereback to 13 again."

I'm not sure how to even describe the disaster of that game. Thenumber of times that the Lions have had victory IN THEIR JAWS only tohave it SNATCHED CRUELLY AWAY... unbelievable. Un fucking believable.

And now one of my friends is threatening to go jump off the bell towerbecause of it. Sigh.

Beth:'s really hard for me to break out of obsession from one to the other. I'm hardly thinking of football because of thinking about baseball.

Kristen: Yeah, I'm with you, Beth. I am firmly in baseball mode today and the Pats' score is like an unpleasant footnote. It's like I've diagnosed the problem: without Harrison and Seymour, you can't stop the run, let alone Tomlinson. So there you go. Now fix it and win some goddamn football games. And now back to baseball. Poor Pats.

Beth: Cold, Hard Football Facts says the Pats are cooked. They make great points about the importance of Rodney Harrison in the Pats' defense, and in the context of the other injuries / absences, things truly do look dire.

And how bout them Bengals?

Mer: Because I'm too lazy to check anywhere else - what's up with Seymour this Sunday?

Also, I will be in attendance, thanks to free tix from my work, this Sunday for Cowboys vs Eagles. Combine that with the fact that it has finally gotten cold (aka under 80 degrees) here and I am one happy girl.

Beth: Unknown re Seymour. Meanwhile, Bill Simmons RULES:

We need to slow down with this Bengals thing. Seriously, slow the heck down. It's a nice story, they're clearly headed for the playoffs and President Palmer is for real. Heck, they might be headed for a second seed, mainly because their schedule makes Indy's schedule look grueling by comparison. But breaking out clips of the Triplets because Cincy trounced the Browns, Vikings and Bears ... seriously, that's embarrassing. I can't accept this. I won't accept this.

Kristen: I heart Bill Simmons.

And if Richard Seymour goes down, I'm retreating to my bedroom armed with my bathrobe, the Pats championships DVDs and fifteen cans of Pringles. And I'm not coming out until hockey playoffs start.

Beth: Can I come too?

Kristen: Yes. We can build a fort out of all our commemorative championship t-shirts and hoodies.

Beth: Cool. I have an architectural drawing of Gillette Stadium, too. We could either roll it up and use it as a tent pole or we could spread it out and it could be the floor.

Kristen: We are so gonna have the coolest fort around. We can put those "nasty knit caps" that we both have on the doorknob to signal when we need food.

Beth: Seriously. I also have a Super bowl XXXVIII Champions mini banner we can use as a signal flag. Or fly like the Jolly Roger.

And of course enough Tommy pictures to last us through the winter.

Kristen: Alternatively, we could just steal Richard Seymour's suit and live quite comfortably in that.

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